“What do we do now?” That’s the first question I asked my husband after PHILVOCS decreased the alert level to 2.
We still live in fear. We are more anxious. We’re sad seeing the remnants of the eruption. People are pretending to feel okay; faking it until they make it, so to speak. A simple daily routine becomes an obstacle. Before, we’d wake up early to get ready for school and work. Now, we’d rather homeschool them. Their healths are compromised due to visible ashfall aftermath. Although some places are already presentable, the air isn’t safe, especially, to those children who have asthma. I’m flabbergasted as to how the schools or the city government could just brush off everything and back to the normal routine.
The Coronavirus and back to back hospitalization
Just as we were starting over, Tagaytay is yet under trial again. However, this time, the whole nation is affected. Frankly speaking, I am not really happy with how this year is treating everyone. Earlier this year, the Taal erupted and we were clueless! We were shocked. We aren’t even done with cleaning the ashfall yet another trial was given to us. A week after staying in our Tagaytay apartment, my son caught a virus and was rushed to the ER. His Oxygen level was 93 and gasping for air. He was admitted for three days. After a few days, I got terribly sick. I had severe diarrhea that resulted in mild dehydration. Luckily, I wasn’t admitted. My immune system fought it naturally. Wait, there’s more!
A week after, Elsen got admitted again. This time, he had amoebiasis. We went to Qualimed Hospital in Sta. Rosa and was treated fairly. I was like, “Really, Lord? Don’t you want to give this child a break? Or us a break from a financial burden?” I mean even the Philhealth didn’t want to believe that my son is yet admitted again. I was frustrated. My faith was gone. I stopped praying. When Elsen’s oxygen level was dropping, I got scared. I cried like there was no tomorrow. We stayed at the hospital for five days. When we finally got our discharge notice, we were happy. We were hopeful. We planned to go to the beach. We planned to have a house warming.
But, no. A week after, the coronavirus was declared by WHO as a pandemic. Therefore, all communities were on quarantine and lockdown.
I’m suffering from this disease called a “writer’s block.” HAHA. I don’t know, I love writing but I get so technical every time, so I will just stop. They say a change of scenery might help. Not really. I can go to Starbucks with a great view of Taal yet I can’t gather my thoughts.
But last night, I felt extra energy for me to write articles for different publications. I started writing at 3 am. I’m still writing now at 11 am. I am tired and I am rushing to our food drive for our frontliners in Alfonso.
My friends on Facebook know I get panic attacks. And lately, my episodes are severe. I guess I am scared or anxious about what’s going on? How long do we need to wait for this to be over? That every time my son or husband would feel feverish, I would get confused and scared. I don’t know if I should message our Health Center or give it a day to make sure it was just a simple sore throat. Weather sucks here too. It’s hot and cold- the best combination for flu or cough, right?
But I know I am not alone. There are so many out there – especially, our front liners, health workers, and other essential people, who are not only physically drained but also emotionally and mentally. These people don’t get to go home and be with their families. But, I can. So, I thought, my feelings don’t matter.
“Hope is a good thing”- Andy Dufrense
I love The Shawshank Redemption movie. One of the sayings I like there was when Andy Dufrense told Red (played by Morgan Freeman), “hope is a good thing, if not the best of things.”
So, when I am admittedly irritated and frustrated, I will find myself in the kitchen cooking or baking. I am finding ways to help me get through this. Because if I am well, my family is well. If I am okay, everyone at home is and will be okay.
Therefore, we need to support each other. We need to work together.
Having had first-hand experience of the taal eruption, corruption during relief goods and fundraising, and how we unfairly treat our nature and wild animals, this pandemic will repeat itself. If we choose to continue treating our only home like this, this pandemic will be the new “normal” for us, for our children, and for the next generation.
If we can practice social distancing, let’s also practice “social listening.” Let’s listen and learn to respect each other. Stay home. Be safe. Drink your vitamins and supplements regularly. Ultimately, hydrate and pray aggressively!
There’s a common phrase that says “no pain, no glory.” And, it is attributed to the sculpting our body- or being physically healthy. But the truth is, everyone needs to work on one thing: FAITH. Our faith should remain steadfast. We will get through this. We have to believe this too shall pass.
How’s life during these trying times? Do you find this as a “blessing in disguise?”